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continued.......

Things are just getting on top of me at the moment and I'm getting pretty miserable!
My job at school is great and challenging and I am enjoying it despite the serious workload in the evenings! But all I can say is THANK GOD! it is half term next week!! I need the break!

I have never really felt like I needed a break from things before, but I am feeling like that at the moment! I need to go away somewhere and just chill out and some of the things that I like to do, which I don't get to do anymore because of work and because I keep my weekends clear to spend quality time with someone who just goes off and plays golf followed by going to the pub! Fun times! NOT!

There is never any compromise on his part and I never get to do anything that I want to do, or things that I want to do with him. Our weekends seem to be dictated by his wanker of a best friend who is quite frankly, totally obnoxious!
I don't feel happy and he is being utterly selfish. Things have been weird for the last few weeks and I'm beginning to seriously question whether it is worth all this. Whenever I try to talk to him about how I'm feeling he gets totally defensive and gets grumpy, and I can never explain to him that I'm feeling crap because he won't listen! - that isn't a good sign is it!?!
I'm trying so hard to do things for him and to arrange things for us to do and when I do he never wants to do them! I want to go surfing, or go for walks, or go out for a day trip or have a nice lunch in a nice country pub, or just do something together but it never happens!!!!!!! His idea of us spending time together is spending it with his and our friends - yea that works!! AARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! I need help!

And on top of all this I have a very difficult coursework to do and I have 2 weeks in which to finish it and if I'm totally honest - I don't want to do it anymore - it is too much with everything else that I am trying to deal with at the moment!!!!

I'm still here.........just!


I feel I have to write an entry to explain my lack of entries in the past months. The truth is, I am so unbelievably busy. It is something that everyone says and yes, it may seem like an excuse, but actually, it is a reason. There are not enough hours in the day to fit in all the things I need to do and the strain is beginning to show.

I am usually pretty good at hiding my stress and pretending that I'm not struggling. But when I do that, sooner or later it all catchs up with me - look what happened a few years ago!
My new job is going well, there is a lot to do and I am constantly meeting deadlines and planning lessons, marking work, writing intervention programmes, attending meetings, dealing with dickhead teachers (only one or two but a pain all the same!) and all the other stuff I have to do on a daily basis - not to mention the 1 particular student who takes up most of my time (too long a story and too much stress to write!).
That alone involves me working at home until about 9 or 10 every night plus extra at the weekends. Then I have my other job and the bar work too! NOT FUN!!
Don't get me wrong, I LOVE working at Mama Stone's - it's such a cool place to work and to go, but the youth work is just an extra that started off as some much needed extra cash but has now turned into a bit of a pain if I'm honest. Not the job itself, simply the fact that I have absoloutley no time to really do it in despite it being 1 or 2 sessions a month.

........bugger! I have to run, I'm late! .....will finish update later

Long time no write......

Ok saz, you were right! If I have the time to post videos and facebook people then I can find the time to update y'all!!!

I have been utterly crap at keeping up to date with this bloody journal! NOT COOL!!! I just have been soooooo unbelievably busy!!! And here is why..........

Job number 1 - main, full-time job! I LOVE it.....strangely. Because the kids can be really really challenging to say the least!! I have really started to feel confident in myself and my ability with these kids and consequently I am thoroughly enjoying the job! WOOOP!! ALSO - I have had some really good feedback today from the Ed Psych who said he was very impressed with my work and he told my line manager (who used to be my head of year!! wierd I know!) that I should have a promotion! DOUBLE WOOOP!!!

Job number 2 - Rule 7 (aka 'the bar'/'trout heaven') Still doing some weekends etc behind the bar serving the wellyheads! Still loving that too!

Job number 3 - Mama Stone's.......totally rocks!! I just do barwork/cafe etc and it is such an awesome place to work! Wendy and Jonathon are such lovely people and all the staff and students are so sweet! Plus I get to listen to awesome live music every night I'm at work and meet awesome people like Betty Wright and Joss Stone!!!! GET IN!!!

Job number 4 (yes people count 'em....1, 2, 3, 4!!!) - youth work. I am now a part time youth worker running respite type sessions for young carers. Its great!! I love that too!!

So yes, I have 4 jobs and it's all a bit crazy but I'm getting the extra money I need and I love them all!!!! Also, in a weird way I kinda like being so busy! That probably won't last too long though!! lol!

I am also currently working towards gaining Higher Level Teaching Assisstant Status which is hard and I only have a few weeks left to get my arse in gear and finish it but that will be good when I'm all done!
Although I am not loving all the confusing standards etc - grrr!

On other fronts (namely boyfriend!) - we have made it to our 1 year anniversary! HURRAH!! We did have a bit of a fall out a few days before and it was a bit touch and go for a couple of days but we have sorted everything out and we are really good!!! I do love that boy!!

SARAH - the play was really good last night and very funny! I think Keira's voice should stay like that it's too funny!!! lol!!!
And now I am going to go and eat and try and sort my aching shoulders out somehow!! 

Bye world x x x x

Sara Bareilles ~


BEAUTIFUL song!

Sophie live @ mumma stones


this girl is a LEGEND!!!

Sara Bareilles-Love Song


LOVE IT!!!!!

Months have passed by so quickly!

SORRY!!! I have no computer in my new house and rarely get to come home to use this one! So apologies for the slack posting!!!

OK......update!

I can't actually even remember the last time I posted but I think it was a couple of months ago at least ! Right, lets start with the house.

It's going well! I knew before I went in that I would get on with the girls because we are all close friends! So thats all cool! My bedroom is pretty small but as usual I have done a good job of utalizing the space! I'm off to Ikea tomorrow with the mother bird to get the last bits of furniture needed and then will be sorting everything out properly! Also, the cat is moving in with me tomorrow, although he seems blissfully oblivious to this fact! I think he will probably try to bum Marmite....she so does not know what is coming! LOL!!

WORK:....work is going well apart form the fact that I need a pay rise! I need some more moeny so that I can actually save for a house deposit, car, going to Paris etc, you know, only all those BIG life things!!!

THE BOY:......oh the boy! The love of my life! It totally sucks that he is away all week every week and that weekends have to count but it also makes us appreciate our time together more!! (and the boy gives damn good cuddles!)

Ok, this room is so cold my right hand is almost frozen and its getting  hard to type so tata for now!!!!

SORRRRRYYYYY!!!

I know, I know!!!

I have been totally crap at posting lately BUT I have a good reason!!! Just before new year I moved house and I have no internet access there and restricted internet access at work! (stupid school filters!!) and I can only use the computer at mums every so often!! So from now on my entries will be few and far between but I endeavor to keep some kind of regular update going!!


Well, the new house is lush, have moved in with some friends and so far so good. The house is really nice and very homely. it's nice to be living somewhere that doesn't feel like a student doss-house!!

Work is mental at the moment but good. I do enjoy the job, it's just some days (like today) are pretty diffcu;t and it is soooo emotionally draining sometimes! Although I don't intend to stay in this job for more than another academic year, I am gaining valuable experience! The plan is to apply to do Primary teacher training in September (apply in September that is) and then hopefully qualify the year after. My salary at the moment is fine, after all, I'm used to being a skint student!! But teacher's starting salary is about 20k and that would be nice!!

Things with Lloyd are going well, we have been together for 6 months now! It feels like so much longer - in a good way! He is so wonderful, totally makes me laugh ALL the time and puts up with my annoying little habits! heehee!!
It's weird how you never realise just quite what really being in love with someone is like until that special person comes along! 

WOAH! ok- that is enough of the bucket grabbing talk!!

Well, people, I will try and keep you as up to date as possible but until my internet issues are solved that may be difficult!!!


BLEURGH!!

I am getting another cold! ANOTHER ONE!!! Bastard viruses!!

I ache, have a sore throat and am very tired!! I also pulled a muscle in my shoulder last night dancing! GAYNESS!!!

Today has been a bit mad at work, not in a bad way but just in a busy, noisy way! I need to tidy my room and finish packing all my stuff as I'm moving out in like 2 weeks!! And I also need to have a bath and sleep because I feel like I might fall over!!!!

Please excuse me but I am too exhausted to write anything more!